It is obvious that clinging on to a false hope of reconciliation was futile and unhealthy for me. That should be a lesson for all of us. When a relationship is going to end, let it end, despite how strong your feelings are.
No matter how much you love someone, you should never let that love overpower the love you have for yourself. No matter how painful your loss may be, you will survive, as I will. Time will heal all wounds because God is the master of time and healing.
I am so open about my life because I am living it and I feel I have the right to tell my story more than anyone else. I have nothing to hide because I have done nothing wrong but be human and only God can condemn or forgive me for that.
I wish that the outcome could have been different but a relationship takes two people to make it work. It has become painfully obvious that my estranged wife was not committed to do her part. To her credit, she went through a lot while I was in the grip of depression. To be honest, she went through hell. Therefore, I cannot blame her for rejoicing that I will no longer be a part of her life. Hopefully over time she will find someone that will make her rejoice in a more positive way.
She will be mad when she hears about this, but she will get over it like she will get over our marriage. There is no going back anyway, once a spouse says they want a divorce, it is best to let it happen and move on.
There is no pain that God cannot help you overcome, even heartbreak. So for those reading this, take it not as an announcement of a failure, but as a lesson in love and relationships.
If you truly love someone, sometimes it is best to let them go...Hallelujah!